THE LAW OF ASSOCIATION..
Can you clearly see yourself living your dreams?
Can you see yourself getting there by the company you keep, the friends you have?
There are 4 categories of associates you may have:
1. Your CONFIDANTS
2. Your CONSTITUENTS
3. Your COMRADES
4. Your COMPATRIOTS
Your confidants are those you can share inner things even secrets.. They love you UNCONDITIONALLY. They love you for the long haul. They are people who will come bail you out of jail. They don't care about your money, status, weight looks or future. These are usually few, maybe one or two.
Your constituents are people who are with you because what you are for is what they are for. What you want is also what they want. They see you for the complimenting effect you have on them.
Your comrades are not for you and even not for what you are for. But they are AGAINST WHAT YOU ARE AGAINST.. These are people who JUST SHARE a common enemy with you...once the enemy is eliminated everyone goes on with their life. They were never for you or what you were for. This can be so deceiving especially in politics.
Your compatriots are people who can die for you but only for a season. That is when you want to eliminate what they think should be eliminated. Once the season is over don't expect them. In the right season these can be as many as ever! When the season is gone you'll have trouble locating any.
Now.... which associates do you have?
It's dangerous to associate with a comrade thinking they are a confidant. It's worse to treat your compatriots like your confidants!
You must know where your friends fall. Look at your closest 5 friends... Which category do they fall in?
Can the friends you have take you where you want to go? Can you get there with them?
If you can't then change your friends. Associate with other people who can take you there. It's not sinful to do so. Don't associate with people simply because you say "tumetoka mbali" [we've come a long way together].
Ask yourself this: are they going WHERE you are going?? Be sure they are.
Be sure they aren't just against what you are against! You may "toka mbali" all you want but if all they want in life is to start a tour company to operate in Arusha and what you want is to become the African real estate mogul you better part ways! If their mission is to preach in the villages and yours is to preach to the nations part ways for God's sake!
Don't associate with people who are going to Namanga whereas you are headed to the Philippines!
Don't even invite them in your team or else you surely will be frustrated big time.
So look at your associates today and ask yourself OBJECTIVELY:
~ Are they seeing what you are seeing?
~ Are they making you a big dreamer and big thinker?
If you are the best and smartest person in the group get out fast (while you still can), coz you can't learn anything by being told you are the best.
Associate yourself with people who think you "ain't nobody" as the Americans would put it.
Don't throw your dreams away by pleasing people. You are not here to please anyone. Even God doesn't concern Himself with pleasing anyone. He "goes about His business" as though no one is watching. Humans or no humans, angels or no angels, heaven or no heaven He is still God. He knows He can't please all his creatures. Give them sunshine some won't like it..rain some won't like it.. Give them peace in their land some will say they want war for progress.. Let them have war some will ask where is God when people are suffering like this. Be silent some will say there's no God. Answer them by thunder and lightning and some will say what kind of God scares his own children...etc.. See God Himself cant please everyone. Don't try to outsmart Him. Don't stay in a group because you want to please people. Be yourself.
Value your dreams and vision enough to walk away from associates who aren't adding value to you. Who aren't challenging you to become more. Who aren't challenging you to work harder and sleep less.
Be sure where you are going is WHERE your current associates are also headed. Or you won't get there.
Above all ask God for guidance. Seek and ye shall find. People who are waiting to associate with you are available if you look for them. There's no point to lose your dreams because you wanted your friends to b there with you. Sometimes God doesn't want them near you for a good reason. Find new friends. Where would you be really if you associated with your best kindergarten or pre-school friends?
Look at your dreams today and look at your associates. Then determine if their feet are headed where you are. If not, its time to say good-bye, or, even adieu!
All in my upcoming book....
Watch this space..
Andrea G. Muhozya
Dar es Salaam, Tanzania